As a way of working through things after the miscarriage, an attempt to help others through it, and an attempt to just plain help publicize it in an effort to help change the way society expects people to deal with it (yeah, just simple goals), I wrote several articles on Squidoo. Periodically, I update them as I think of more things that I wish someone had told me sooner.
I guess my main point is just that one of the many reasons that I found handling our miscarriage so hard was because not only did my wife and I have totally simplistic ideas about handling miscarriage, we also found that many of the people that we had to deal with also had no idea either! This just made things tougher and more difficult.
The articles that I have done so far are:
Continue reading I wrote a few articles about the experince…
So, a quick confession. After Kye died, I started trying to get my wife to write about it as a way to deal with it and work through things at her own pace. Then she was talking about how she had seen web sites for other babies, so I made this one for her to use. At this point, I don’t think that she has ever seen it. I doubt that anyone but me knows that it exists.
Then at Caring and Beyond, they were talking about scrapbooking what little you have. We had heard of it before, and Paula started to really get into the idea and started buying all kinds of stuff to make a scrapbook for Kye. She still couldn’t bring herself to actually scrapbook anything, but we had the stuff and we started to get together everything that we do have. It turns out that we have a lot more than we thought.
Finally, on the weekend of Kye’s due date, our oldest son was out of town with his Nana, we sent our daughter to a friend’s for that day, and that weekend Paula started scrapbooking like mad. Finally, at the end of the weekend, our son came home and we packed up all the scrapbook stuff so as not to make things to tough on him (he is 14).
I decided that I really should and would like to make a page or two as my message to Kye, so I bought a few things and started thinking about it and planing it. The sad thing is that after all my gentle nudges to get Paula to do some scrapbooking, I just can not bring myself to do it. It still hurts to much.
Continue reading A quick confession about scrapbooking
Paula wrote a poem named
‘HowAre You’ on
AuthSpot.
Reflecting on grief and death of a child. Societal pressures to pretend every thing’s okay. Sometimes things just aren’t.
Continue reading How Are You
